My Mommy

I got to spend a good portion of my day today with one of my favorite people: my mother. Mommy texted last night and asked if we could visit in some way/shape/form today and I texted with an enthusiastic “yes!” We’ve both been very busy lately… her with her school’s play and me with my library’s arts gala event (let’s face it, we’re both super-important people), and we just haven’t had a chance to see each other.

Today she came over to visit me, Nate, and the boys (minus Nick, who was at his mom’s this weekend). She bought stuff for Nate to cook us dinner (bacon hamburgers on the grill with an assortment of cheeses and a super-duper garlic dip!) and even bought some extras… strawberries for Trent, single-serve ice cream cups for all of us, a special Girl Scout thin mint creamer for me. She brought over Frozen, which she surprisingly purchased recently, for us all to watch together. We ate until we were sick-full and had garlic-dragon breath and watched the movie which was really awesome, and we played with the boys. Then she and I chatted about mom/daughter things that didn’t involve kids and husbands, just ourselves. It was heavenly. I kept asking if she wanted coffee or tea, somewhat because I always offer several times to all my guests, but mostly because I didn’t want her to go.

When she’s not around I miss my mom. A lot. I love her. She’s the best teacher I’ve ever had; my greatest mentor, most gentle critic, and most dedicated fan. She asks a million and one questions when I want to talk gossip or speculation with her. She asks no questions when I come to her after an argument with Nate. She knows what I need to hear when I need to hear it and she knows how to issue the best kind of comforting silence when that’s all there is for me. She never criticizes me too harshly but doesn’t ever let me settle for anything that isn’t my best. She’s encouraging in the most upbeat, funny, and gentle way. I love her.

I’ve said this before, but I don’t tell people I love them enough. I feel weird saying it, and I don’t know how to fit it in without it being awkward. I need to tell Mommy, and everyone, I love them more often.

I have a handful of friends who’ve lost a loved one. My best friend lost her dad very unexpectedly a few years ago. My other close friend lost her mom unexpectedly almost 5 years ago. I don’t know how these friends make it through without their parents. I don’t know what I would do without mine. I know some people have rough relationships with their parents, but other than the normal angst-ridden teen moments where I flung myself around and whined and cursed about how awful they were to me, I’ve never had a poor relationship with either parent. I think about these friends of mine who’ve lost a piece of their lives and dread that feeling. It consumes me more than I like to admit. Gah! I’m crying about it now.

I guess what I’m saying is this: my mom is my best friend. She’s a mother and a teacher and a critic and a friend. She’s taught me everything I know. I feel like I’ve turned out pretty nicely, and it’s because of her. I follow in her footsteps in nearly everything because I look up to her. I want her to know that every day forever.





2 thoughts on “My Mommy”

  1. I love how you’ve written this. Losing a parent is difficult. I read somewhere that parents are like your anchors and I can totally understand that. I mean, you’ve known them the longest, right? You think about them almost every day when they’re gone and I hate that that’s what my kids will experience when it’s my and DH’s time to go. Take as many photos and videos as you can and have as much fun and do as much as you can with them.

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